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Beginner’s Guide to Tantric Sex: What It Is and How to Do It

Don’t be intimidated by the name — pleasure is well within your reach. Tantric sex is an ancient practice that is a lot easier than you think. If you’re interested in spicing up your sex life but are out of options, tantric sex may be the answer you’ve been looking for.

What is tantric sex? Tantric sex is a 5,000-year-old Eastern practice that combines spirituality and sex to create (apparently) mind-blowing orgasms. Tantric sex is supposed to bring enlightenment to you and your partner’s sex life. You feel pleasure longer due to prolonged lovemaking and extended states of arousal that you focus on building throughout sex which leads to a powerful orgasm.

How to incorporate elements of tantric sex into the bedroom. Does it sound complicated? Don’t worry, no need to travel to the East for a meditation retreat. There are a variety of things you can do to bring tantric sex into you and your partner’s sex life without you having to devote your life to the practice of Tantra.

Shut out the rest of the world. Turn down the lights and set the mood. Clean the bedroom, adorn the bed with blankets and pillows, light some candles and put out some fruits and drinks for you both to enjoy. Remember: Tantric sex is an experience.

Focus on your breathing and your partner’s reaction to touch. Do not check out mentally during sex. Pay attention and reflect on what you are experiencing in your body. Notice how you are breathing and how you partner is responding to various interactions.

Giving and receiving. Start with kisses. Take this time to explore each other’s mouths with your tongues. Give yourself over to the active role. Put your all into giving into your partner. When you are receiving, surrender to the experience.

Tantric sex exercises. Tantric sex is all about the intimacy between two people. There are a number of exercises to get you started with Tantra. Stand opposite of one another and stare deeply into each other’s eyes. Place your hand on their heart and match your breathing with one another for a couple of minutes. Next, sit face-to-face with your partner and wrap your arms around one another. Press your body against theirs… This skin contact promotes feelings of intimacy. Finally, ensure that you are moving and breathing slowly during sex. Avoid any positions that you know make you orgasm easily. Work towards a gradual build-up of pleasure; the slower the better.

Break the cultural taboo behind sex by talking about it. Shed your inhibitions and your own self-imposed sexual limitations and you are likely to experience more pleasure. Open up to your partner and speak about these taboos frankly. Explicit conversation is the first step to overcoming these taboos.

Take it a step further by exploring a sexual taboo together. Once you have talked about and identified these taboos, decide on one you both may be interested in breaking. Making love with the lights on can even be one; you don’t have to do something huge to begin with. Baby steps.

Tell your partner what you adore about them. “I really love…” Being true and authentic is so special. Sex is not a time for discussion, but for sharing. Share with them what is deep inside your head.

Meditate together. Clear your mind and connect your two hearts; become one. Sit down facing one another, with your eyes closed. Breathe deeply and be together in this present silence.

Tantric massage. Have your partner lay face down. You are about to awaken their body with a variety of sensations. Touch their skin with flowers, fabrics, ice, wax and more. Start with a gentle touch, then proceed with longer and fuller touches. Start with non-erogenous zones like the back and hands, then excite their sexual energy by moving towards their buttocks, inner thighs and finally genitals.

Ending your session. After all this build up, you will probably decide to make love — or not! If you decide not to engage in sex, lay in each other’s embrace and share your feelings with one another. If you do decide to make love, do not rush it. Allow it to happen naturally. Guide your consciousness along your spine, between your heart and genitals, and focus on these sensations as your begin to move… You should melt into one another!

Tantric sex position: The Hot Seat. With your partner kneeling behind you and leaning slightly backwards, kneel in front of him with your legs between his. Squeeze your bodies together and move up and down. Encourage him to wrap his arms around your waist and let his hands explore your body.

Tantric sex position: The Wow-Him Powwow. Sit your man down with his legs crossed. Face him and straddle his legs by lowering yourself into his lap. Wrap your legs around him and hold on tight. Rock back and forth together, increasing your speed until climax.

Tantric sex position: Get Down On It. Put your partner in the lotus position with his legs crossed and his heels atop the opposite knee. Face him, get in his lap and mount him with your legs wrapped securely around his waist. Rock your pelvis back, focusing on your breath. Your man should mirror your movements.



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