If you have been in a hookup or a relationship where you just weren’t getting your sexual needs met, you already know how exasperating it is to deal with a guy who just doesn’t care whether you get your needs met. Nothing is quite as infuriating as pleasuring a guy, only to know that he won’t bother giving you pleasure in return. Ever wonder why guys do it? Well, we decided to talk to some guys who have a habit of choosing to rush it – or who used to do it, and why they did it. Here’s what they had to say.Have you ever had a selfish partner in bed? Tell us how you handled that problem in the comments section below!
“I was having an affair. The other woman tired me out.” – Roy, 37, Brooklyn. Roy said that the reason he was so quick with his wife was because he was spending all his time pleasing another girl. He said that he would have quick sex with his wife in hopes that she wouldn’t think he was cheating.
“I didn’t really care about her.” – Mike, 26, NYC. Mike said that the reason that he didn’t do much for the last girl he was with was because he just didn’t care enough to bother. He said, “She was just a pump and dump. I’m sorry, but I got mine and I’m going to get out. You don’t want to get a girl getting feelings, and good sex does that.”
“It was a quickie.” – Jared, 30, Hoboken. Jared’s last hookup basically was a rush job, according to him. He explained that there was “little foreplay” and that sex had to last only 5 minutes or so because of the location. Jared explained, “We were having sex in a public park in a crowded town. We HAD to rush it!”
“She would have started crying if I didn’t sleep with her, and I wasn’t in the mood.” – John, 23, Lakewood. John said that his girlfriend was constantly badgering him for sex, and that he wouldn’t be able to get away from her without sleeping with her quickly. “She would have started crying, and I just wanted to sleep,” he said. “So, I rushed through it so she’d not be upset with me.”
“Cocaine does weird things to me, okay?” – Ryan, 26, Queens. Ryan said the reason he became selfish in his last hookup is because he was under the influence of cocaine (and the other things). Hey, at least he can blame the drugs on this faux pas. Others were way worse, if you ask us.
“It’s not my duty to get her off.” – Tyrese, 24, Jersey City. Tyrese explained that he doesn’t see why there’s “all this pressure on men to do all the work.” He said that with his ex, he made it clear that “getting an orgasm is HER job,” and that he was there to get his own needs met. Hm. We can see why he’s an ex…
“To be honest, I wasn’t into her.” – Peter, 27, NYC. Peter said that the reason that he rushed his last hookup was pretty simple: he just was not very into the girl. He explained, “For me, if I like a girl, I’ll go slow and savor every drop of her sexual experience with me. I just wanted to get mine and go this time around.”
“It was the mood.” – Adam, 30, Bronx. For Adam’s last hookup, the reason why he rushed and forgot about the woman’s pleasure was because he was so into her. He explained, “I don’t know what it was, but I just wanted this girl so bad…everything just turned into a blur.” We’re hoping that he at least will make it up to her later.
“Most girls seem fine when I just focus on my own pleasure, so why not?” – Bruce, 28, Jersey City. Bruce explained that it’s never been a big focus for him because girls always compliment him regardless. He then looked at us and asked us, “Wait, were they lying or unhappy? They’d let me know, right?” (We don’t know, Bruce.)
“Sometimes, you just need to meet your own needs.” – Nick, 28, Brooklyn. Nick explained that it was nothing the other girl did. It was just that he really wanted to have sex, and that he really wanted to have an orgasm. The other girl seemed lukewarm to it, so he just hurried it up so as “not to bother her.”
“She’s my side chick, she knows what’s up.” – Amir, 31, NYC. Amir said that he focuses on “taking time for the main chick,” and that girls that he’s just randomly hooking up with won’t get that attention from him. He explained, “It’s my way of showing that she’s still special to me.” (We have no words, Amir…)
“If she doesn’t like it, she can find someone else.” – Matt, 28, Baltimore. Matt said that it doesn’t matter to him what she thinks about him being a selfish lover. More succinctly, he explained, “I don’t care about her. If she doesn’t like it, then she can find someone else. I have no problem getting girls to bone me.”
“To be honest, I really don’t like having sex.” – Mihai, 27, NYC. Mihai said that it’s a matter of personal issue. He explained, “I don’t want to get into it very much, but I have sexual issues. Deep seated ones.” His way of just coping with it in the dating scene is to just rush through sex.
“I’m lazy.” – Isaac, 25, Brooklyn. Isaac explained that it’s not a matter of him having another girl or not being into the girl who he’s having sex with. Rather, for him, he just flat-out said it’s a matter of laziness. He said, “I know it’s not good, but hey, that’s who I am.”
“She wouldn’t leave me alone until I had sex with her.” – Gideon, 29, Hoboken. Gideon said that it was a matter of the fact that she just wouldn’t let up, and the fact that he really didn’t want to have sex. He explained, “If the sex sucked, maybe she wouldn’t want to have sex with me again.”
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