Sex Tips We Wish Every Guy Knew

Pleasing a woman during sex isn’t as elusive as the media makes it out to be. We promise. If you’re looking to adult films for tips, look elsewhere. Pleasure is personal, and every woman wants something different, but there are a few general rules that work for most women. Talking to your girl can help, but Cosmopolitan compiled a list to help you along, and we found a few other pointers. Here are sex tips we wish every guy knew.

Not the end. A man’s climax is not always the grand finale. Sorry. Sometimes, we want to keep going, and it’s selfish to leave us hanging.

Not your ex. Just because your last girlfriend wanted one thing, doesn’t mean your next one will. Every woman is extraordinarily different when it comes to what gets her off. Experiment, ask questions (“Does this feel good?”), and keep an open mind.

Ask. If you’re not sure if you’re doing it right, just ask. Ask her what she likes, what she doesn’t like, and what will absolutely never work. If she’s not sure, the conversation will lead you in the right direction. Be vocal about what you like as well.

A woman’s right to shave. Don’t ask a woman to shave her pubic hair if she doesn’t want to. You wouldn’t demand she change her hairstyle, so this is no different. It’s our choice, and it’s not up for discussion.

Opening act. Foreplay is the best part. Especially for women. We want foreplay to go on until we’re begging you to stop. And women usually need to be emotionally stimulated for sex. According to WebMD, foreplay can help prepare both your mind and body for sex. “Many women need to be kissed, hugged, and caressed to create lubrication in the vagina, which is important for comfortable intercourse.”

Misleading. Sex is not like adult film. Real people do not act or look like they do in adult films. If a woman looks like she’s getting off on camera, she’s probably faking it for the money. Adult films are highly slanted toward a male perspective.

Killing her softly. Too much pressure on the clitoris can be painful. Women can be very sensitive down there. Gentle caressing that builds up to harder stroking feels amazing.

Talk to us. Women are more verbal than men in the bedroom. We like you to talk to us, tell us the things you like while they’re happening, and how turned on you are. Don’t overdo it, or be fake, just express yourself.

Giving her the finger. Fingering can be pleasurable. When done softly. Most women don’t like heavy finger thrusting, especially right away. Warm us up first! What we all love is…

Oral. Show me a woman who doesn’t love oral sex (or a human being in general). It’s an easy way to show a woman you appreciate her body and actively want to pleasure her. Some women can only orgasm this way. Do it as much as humanly possible (she’ll return the favor).

Twirling. Making circular hip movements while thrusting can help hit all our spots. According to Pattiknows, “A circular motion is good for the clitoris, and trust me you want to stimulate the clitoris. He should push his hips up slightly while he screws.” The same goes for women when they are on top.

Positionality. Some positions will never feel good to us. In fact, they’ll probably just make us uncomfortable. Just because something is physically possible doesn’t mean it was meant to happen.

But spice it up. We like to feel desired. Sexting us during the day can get us in the mood for later. Or initiating a quickie in a spontaneous location like a car or the woods can be really hot.

New territory. If you want to try something new, like bondage or anal, just ask. Communication is an important element of sexual intimacy. And when your partner is really into something, that’s a turn-on for us, because it shows you truly desire us.

Not in the mood? When a woman turns down sex, it isn’t a sign she’s not into you. Sometimes we just don’t feel like it, so please respect that. Don’t take it personally.

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