What Your Sex Number Says About You

It is a question people of both sexes always ask. Your friends ask it, your prospective lovers ask it, even the guy on the subway asks it. For some reason, people always want to know what another person’s sex number is. Why is this such an intriguing, crucial piece of information? Some people want to know as a point of comparison. (“Is my number normal?”) Some people want to know because they’re looking to see what they can find out about the gritty side of your life. So, what does your number really say about you?

“What’s your number?” Scientists have yet to determine whether this or the “what’s your sign?” question is worse. Both are pretty bad, and both are questions that people always ask for some reason. While other people have no doubt asked you what your sex number is, have you stopped to ask yourself about it and what it really means?

 

What is a “healthy” number? There is no exact number. However, a number we would consider healthy is one that leaves you feeling confident and in control. You should be happy with your sexual experiences and you should be seeking them out for positive reasons, not negative ones. For instance, if you’ve slept with 15 people because you loved two of them, liked a handful of them, and just wanted to have fun with the remaining, that’s totally fine! But if you slept with 15 people because you just couldn’t stand the thought of being alone, that’s a problem.

 

1 doesn’t have to mean you’re lonely, although you might be. People often say that “one is the loneliest number.” In some cases, this might be sadly true. In others, however, it’s just a matter of choice. There could be several reasons why you’ve only slept with one person and guess what? It doesn’t mean something is wrong with you.

 

You’re looking for something special. So maybe you’re kind of a loner who can’t get dates. Maybe. Or, you might just be looking for something special. Sex to some people is a very, very special and intimate thing. Don’t feel like you have to sacrifice your values because people think you’re weird.

 

You’re looking for the right person. You might not just be looking for the right time or the right experience, but you might be looking for “the one”. Some people wish to wait until marriage. Other people wish to wait until they’re at least very serious with a person.

You see sex as an emotional experience. If you fall into any of these aforementioned categories and your number is on the lower side, you probably see sex as an incredibly emotional experience. Yes, sex does physically feel good. We all know that. But to you, the physical sensation of sex is secondary.

You are extremely reserved. Everyone is different. Society has a tendency to label women very drastically. If you enjoy having sex, you’re a slut. If you’re reserved about sex, you’re a prude. If you’re on the more reserved side, that’s fine. It just means that it will take someone significant to take you to that wonderful place. But ask yourself, are you standoffish as a person in general?

You’re picky. And that’s OK! If your number is on the lower side and it’s because you’d rather sleep with people who meet your standards than settle, there is nothing wrong with that. However, if you’re frustrated by your lack of action, you may need to think about your standards and how high is too high.

Your number is rising and rising. If your number is steadily rising, it’s nothing to be concerned about. As we get older, this is what normally happens. However, if you suddenly notice a spike in your sexual stats, you might want to check yourself.

You just see sex as a fun physical activity. The reason your number could be skyrocketing could be because you just see it as something fun to do. You’re more focused on the physical aspect of sex versus the emotional. This might be because you’re in a particular time of life that has you in party mode or because it’s just who you are.

You may be seeking validation. If your number is soaring up and up, even towards the triple digits, it may not be for such fun reasons. On the surface, you can be telling yourself that this is the reason, but subconsciously you could be sleeping with as many people as possible as a form of self-validation. People with emotional issues including very low self-esteem often do this.

You see it as an accomplishment. You’re the type of person who is looking for conquests. You don’t see sex as a mutual activity between two (or more, who knows) people, you see it as an opportunity to prove your worth and flaunt your ego. Of course, we know that the more person feels compelled to this type of behavior, the worse they are actually feeling about themselves deep down.

You fall for literally everyone. You could just be a sucker for all things love, sex and romance. The phrase “love at first sight” was made for you. You tend to act before you think. It may get you into trouble, it may not.

You’re experienced, but it doesn’t rule your life. Then, of course, there’s the happy medium. You’ve had your fair share of romantic nights and you’ve checked some boxes off your bucket list, but it’s not the only thing you think about. While sex is an important aspect of the human experience, it isn’t everything. You have your fun and your meaningful one-on-one’s, and you’re totally fine with the way things are.

It’s about quality not quantity. As long as you’re safe and you take care of yourself, who the fuck really cares? In the end, it’s about the quality of your sex life, not the number of people you’re sleeping with. Just make sure to do a little mental health eval and check up on yourself from time to time to ensure you’re in the right frame of mind!

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